RobNip™ 43.5 – Robster’s Dicktionary – Sports Edition

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It’s finally time for another Robster’s Dicktionary! Yay! Mmmmmm. Robster.

Ahem. I mean Robster….

Robception (noun): when a member of the Robsessed manages to run into Rob somewhere and give him a little what for…

Penalty (noun): what happens when a member of the Robsessed shows Rob a little bit too much fangirling action. Dean is forced to step in and give them a penalty.

Tuck rule (noun): A rule stating that Rob shall nevermore take part in any action which could be perceived to be a “Tuck.” (Did you know this is a rule in American football? I did not…)

Scrum (noun): the look of having just rolled out of bed after a night of beer, hot pockets, and loose women, worn by both Rob and TomStu. (Doesn’t this word just sound dirty?!)

RBI (noun): Rob’s Balls In! (Way more fun than that stupid baseball definition…)

Spread Eagle (noun): (1) What my legs involuntarily do when looking at Rob porn… (2) Preferable Rob positioning after too much beer (see scrum).

Wiffle bat (noun) : term of affection for any plastic, rubber, and/or silicone phallus-shaped object used by women after viewing Rob Porn. Usage: Beks named her new purple wiffle bat “Rob,” ’cause it’s long and strong, just like Rob’s own.

We hope you join us again soon, for another round of Robster’s Dicktionary!!

RobNip™ 43.4 – Tennis Rob

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Ah. There’s nothing better than this week – everyday has been a day where Rob has played with his bat and/or balls! What’s not to love?

Today we have Tennis Rob. He’s really rarin’ to play with his balls this morning! He’s got a wicked serve, so watch out… Frick, there’s another ace!

The dark green court really sets off Rob’s pasty white skin… It’s quite the sight to behold.

It’s game, set, match with Tennis Rob… It’s love-all for awhile, but Rob is really working those balls, and soon its deuce! Watch out, this is a match point! But really, it’s always a win when you get to look at Tennis Rob the whole time…

RobNip™ 43.3 – Cricket Rob

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So… what do you know about cricket? You know, the sport. Not Jiminy. At this point I should probably mention that we here at RobNips are all Americans. We have little or no insight into cricket. I had to look it up on Wikipedia to even write this post. My previous knowledge was limited to the end of Bend it Like Beckham, when that HAWT Irish guy plays with the chick’s dad. Not like that, you perverts. Plays CRICKET. I think. I’m just assuming here, given that I have zero knowledge of what that would look like. Maybe it is LIKE THAT.

But that is irrelevant. You know why? Because this game, like the all-American sport of baseball, is played with bats and balls.

I mean, just look at Rob’s bat! I think we’ve all seen pictures in the last day or so that once again have reinforced just how very large Rob’s bat is… (if you dont know what I’m talking about, go HERE. and look down.) Seriously, I’m amazed he can even pick that shizz up! It’s just so big! (just like Becky’s butt)

And lets not even talk about Rob’s balls! Erm, well, lets. Balls will be flying all around that pitch. Given the size of his bat, we can’t even see his balls! But I’m fairly sure that we’re all imagining them… Sigh. What were we talking about?

Oh, yeah. Cricket. Apparently it’s played on a pitch. And involves a bowler. (insert token cricket reference here) Have we talked about cricket enough? I think we should all get back to what’s really important here. Staring at Rob’s bat.

RobNip™ 43.2 – Football (aka Soccer) Rob

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You know what the best things about soccer/football are?

Balls are always checked for firmness. Mhmmm.

Parents always cheer when you score… ahem. Weird.

You can score using your head or your feet. Which really brings to mind some very kinky shit.

You can juggle balls in front of your mother… Also kinky shit. We’re on a roll today, heyoooo!

Ah well, why don’t you kick that ball this way, Rob. There might be a ‘no hands touching’ rule in soccer, but we don’t have any rules. RAWR. Score!

RobNip™ 43.1 – Rugby Rob

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RAWR. What’s not to love about Rugby Rob?

First off, he’s naked, FTW!

Gah! I’ll be chasing Rugby Rob around the ruck all day…

Once I catch him, he’ll be down for the count. And when I say down, I mean DOWN.

Goal!

RobNip™ 42.5 – The Princess Bride Rob

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My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

Honestly, the Princess Bride is one of my favorite movies. LOVE it. Seriously, what’s not to like? Romance, action, intrigue, suspense… torture, crazy accents… Gah! LOVE it. I watch it every time it’s on. Who doesn’t love the adventures of Buttercup, Wesley/the Dread Pirate Roberts, and Prince Humperdink?

But really.

Mawidge…mawidge is what bwings us togewer today… Mawidge, the bwessed awwangement, that dweam wiffim a dweam… … Ven wuv, twoo wuv, wiw fowwow you fowever..

I could go on for hours with this stuff.  Stop, you say?

As you wish!

RobNip™ 42.4 – The Notebook Rob

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We don’t think we’ve ever been jealous of a head of hair before. Even for us, that’s a new one. Notebook Rob, with that caveman beard and intense sex stare, is what pure fantasy of made of. Not to mention, the Notebook is about destiny and finding your own true soulmate, whatever the cost. How flipping romantic is that? In a word: RAWR.

RobNip™ 42.3 – Highlander Rob

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If you haven’t read the Highlander Series by Karen Marie Moning, you are missing out!! Get on that shit!

I would definitely be willing to travel through time for the chance to meet Highlander Rob! In fact, I would be willing to do pretty much anything for a chance to get a peek under that kilt… RAWR. Really, I’m open to pretty much anything Highlander Rob is interested in doing to/with me. Can you just imagine? That body in that kilt, with a Scottish highlands accent?!

I think I just came.

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Also, the Fever Series by Karen Marie Moning is also one of our favorites. SO GOOD!

RobNip™ 42.2 – Gone With the Wind Rob

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A dashing Civil War era Rob with no undershirt? Yes, please. And thank you. We’d make my own dress if meant him admiring our…curtains. Scarlett O’Hara went to a heck of a lot of trouble to try and forget Rhett Butler, she even went as far as marrying another man. But of course it didn’t work. They were simply meant for each other, good or bad. Rhettbert, you can fight destiny, but in the end, tomorrow is another day.

RobNip™ 42.1 – Time Traveler’s Wife Rob

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This week we’re imagining Rob in some of our favorite romance novels… We all know that Rob has the capability to be an amazing romantic lead, so this should be fun!

There’s something so romantic about this story… Clare knows Henry Rob from the time she is a little girl, and grows up loving him. He, on the other hand, was traveling from the future, so when they met when Clare was finally an adult, he had no idea who she is. But the love is there.

Rob would completely shine as Henry… He definitely has the brooding, torn thing down. And what could be more romantic than waiting for and finally meeting the man of your dreams?