We are currently in a place where we can no longer continue with RobNipulations™. Unfortunately, that means that we cannot continue posting at RobNips™, and we are closing effective today. It’s been a great ride, but it’s true that all good things must come to an end.
Thank you, our dear, pervy readers for all you have done to make this site successful! We appreciate you more than you know!
RobsButtonsBabe will still be taking requests for banners, photo edits, manips, and wallpapers, and may also start another wordpress or a tumblr for her work. She hopes to create a portfolio in preparation for starting school in the fall for graphics design.
RPattzlawyer will continue with her deviant lawyering, having as much sexytimes as she can get her hands (and other things) on…
amberchagrined still rolls hardcore jurist, remains devoted to grape Jolly Ranchers and Skittle juice.
AngryBadgerGirl will continue telling jokes…mostly to her dog, who just sits there and looks at her funny.
So once again, thank you for everything and keep in touch!
Yes, lucky readers, it’s time for us to once again turn to the Robster’s Dickionary for more important terms. We here at RobNipulations are dedicated to increasing your vocabulary. Today’s topic is something close to all of our hearts — the PENIS.
We present you with this list of penis euphemisms, and some Rob-related commentary
A – Ass Cleaver (This is one of Rob’s BFF’s favorites)
B – Big Boy Beanpole (Magical, and grows so big and tall – just like in a fairy tale)
C – Chicksicle ( You like ’em cold and sparkly, right? And perfect for licking!)
E – Elephant Trunk (That’s what Water for Elephants is about, right?)
F – Fallopian Fiddler (Play my parts anytime, baby!)
G – Godzilla (*smirk* @RebyKay)
H – Heat-Seeking Moisture Missile (What can I say? Hot, moist — exactly!)
I – Impregnator Injector (Shoot me up anytime)
J – Joy Juicer (Nom nom nom)
K – King Dong (Clearly)
L – Lickin’ Stick (It’s like I always say, ell eye LICKY see kay LICKY why)
M – Melon Baster (*splash*)
N – Nine Inch Nudger (Ummm, yes, please!)
O – One-Eyed Wonder Worm (the Eighth – or eight inch? – Wonder of the World)
P – Purple Pulsating Pillar of Power (Purple is cool.)
Q – Quantum Jizzix (My preferred area of study)
R – Robinator (Always, always — he cums back!)
S – Sparkly Tickler (You want to know if he really sparkles down there, dontcha?)
T – Tom’s Toy Thumb (Heh)
U – Uterus Unicorn (Y’all remember Prancing Unicorn Rob, right?)
V – Vulva Volvo (Mmm, you can park your Volva in my special place)
W – Womb Warrior (Always ready to conquer)
X – Xstacy Stick (You know some stickin’ would cause some ecstacy!)
Y – Yum Yang (Like Chinese food — you eat some and you always want some more later)
Z – Zamboner (Absolutely necessary to keep one’s special rink open for play)
The soundtrack for today’s post is clearly Shontelle’s Licky (Under the Covers)
Thanks to @thedailydogfood, @sarahnxx, and @RobsButtonsBabe for entries. Thanks also to the Elitefitness.com forum and various sites on the interwebs for inspiration and terms as well!
Is that…Rob Dobler? OMG. It. Is. He’s only the combination of the two most lovable creatures known to womankind: Rob and Lloyd Dobler, the tender-hearted slacker hero from the modern classic Say Anything. And why is Rob looking so smug? Because he already has his life goals figured out. He knows that he doesn’t want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. He doesn’t want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, he doesn’t want to do that.
Our next question is from someone who made a New Year’s resolution to get in shape…
Question: Rob do you have any fitness tips?
Rob says: It’s very important to watch your diet and keep hydrated. I prefer Hot Pockets and Heinekens – the food and drink of champions. I also suggest airbrushing. That’s essential to my fitness routine.
Well that’s some more great advice! Airbrushing those bulges and stretch marks will make all the difference!
Stay tuned for more of Rob’s Words of Advice!
Our next question comes from someone seeking Rob’s expertise in looking good for special occasions.
Question: I have semi-formal occasion coming up. I’m very nervous and don’t know what to wear.
Rob says: I suggest a smart fitting suit and shimmer powder.
Good advice, Rob! That always works brilliantly! I’m sure the questioner’s date will love it!
As we start the New Year, we realized that you, the brilliant and amazing readers of RobNipulations, might want to turn to Rob, and utilize his own experience and wisdom to help you accomplish your goals this year.
Therefore, we are happy to bring to you: Rob’s Words of Advice
Our first question is from a current job-hunter.
Question: I’m nervous about a job interview I have coming up, what should I do?
Rob says: Take a half, err, a quarter of a valium and you’ll do great.
We all know that advice worked out well for Rob, and hopefully it will for you, too, job-seeker!
Stay tuned for more of Rob’s Words of Advice!
Rob, along with the hOOrs here at RobNipulations, wants to wish you and yours a Happy Nude Rear!!!
We hope you all have a fabulous year, filled with sexy men/women and lots of lovin!
Yup, balls to the wall today, because these balls are gonna DROP!!
Looks like Rob’s a little concerned tho… he’s jumping ship early — probably in an effort to protect his OWN balls! Alright everyone, do your part and help Rob keep his balls from dropping! Keep those sacred balls safe!!
Happy New Years Eve!!
*click to get full size images*