Robnipulate (verb): to touch and/or retouch "Robert Pattinson" with skillful hands, by the use of mechanical means.

Posts tagged “Resolution Rob

RobNip™ 15.4 – Resolution Rob: compose more music

Finishing up his resolutions for the new year, Resolution Rob would also like to spend more time composing music.

And hey, I feel like I should learn a little musical theory as well… With just a little help from me, I’m very sure that Rob can show me how we can make beautiful music together. Whether we’re hitting the high notes or Rob is strumming my, erm, strings… a good time will be had by all!

So, here’s to a Happy 2010, filled with much post-coital serenading!


RobNip™ 15.3 – Resolution Rob: learn to cook

Rob’s life is very hectic, but todays New Year’s resolution includes him becoming more adept in the kitchen.  Oh yes, Resolution Rob is the next Naked Chef!

Chef Rob wants to give it to you on the counter, on the table, under the table, heck, he’ll bang you up against the fridge.  Chef Rob has mad skillz with his big, umm, knife. Like any good chef, he knows how to get out the butter and slap it on THICK.  Wait, is that a big, fat, delicious beef stick hiding under his apron? Oh Chef Rob makes my mouth water. I’m licking my lips and ready, willing, and able to assist him in the kitchen — in any way I can.  Wouldn’t you agree?  If not you must have clicked on the wrong site. 🙂


RobNip™ 15.2 – Resolution Rob: spend more time with Tom

Last year was a crazy year for Rob, and Resolution Rob knows that there is another aspect to his life he needs to work on . . . spending time with treasured friends.

Therefore, Rob resolves to spend more time with his *extra special* BFF, Tom, this year.  Yes, these two have been inseparable since their diaper days.

And now the two share more, errr, adult pursuits.  Who wouldn’t like to get these two sloppy drunk and create a few, ahem, “friendly” memories of our own?

So here’s to spending more time with loved ones like Resolution Rob — let’s break out the Heinekens and dollar bills!


RobNip™ 15.1 – Resolution Rob: clean house

As you know, Rob has made several resolutions this year. Making sure he takes better care of his apartment/hotel room is high on that list. Let’s join Resolution Rob as he attempts to do some laundry.

No honey, don't put all of those colors together...

Rob, babe… I can think of some much more interesting activities to do on a washing machine. Just help me up…

Sadly, Resolution Rob got wet during all of the… erm, activities… with the washing machine, so he had to take his shirt off. He’s just waiting for the iron to get hot so he can finish up the laundry. Well, Rob, there’s something else here that’s wicked hot for you. Me. Wanna see how stable that ironing board is?

There’s something so satisfying about having a clean house. Rob certainly loves it. But Rob really loves that wonderful shag carpet. Oh look, it’s right in front of a fireplace! Rob might just have to finish the vacuuming later, because we’ll be busy with other things…

Poor Rob – he’s all tuckered out from this mornings many, um, activities. Let’s let him nap. He’ll need his energy for what I have planned for tomorrow…