Robnipulate (verb): to touch and/or retouch "Robert Pattinson" with skillful hands, by the use of mechanical means.

Posts tagged “Drunk Rob”

RobNip™ 9.4 – Yoga with Rob

As you know, Rob has taken a second job to earn his Heineken and Hot Pocket money in these tough economic times. Unfortunately, you may remember that Rob’s drinking habits are leading to a few minor issues in his side career, especially on this, the day after Thanksgiving….Please join us as we again present, Yoga with Rob.

First off, everyone breathe deeply. In and out. Arms up in a Sun Salutation pose. And bring them back down.

Please lay on your back. Rob will be starting with Inversions. Move slowly with Rob into the Plow pose…

Oh my. Rob is looking a little, erm, catatonic after all of revelries of last night…

Remember to keep your focus on your breathing. Next, Rob will move into the Dolphin pose.

Rob is so very flexible! It’s nice to see such a new yoga practitioner really getting into the spirit of yoga. Alright Rob honey, it’s time to go home! Oh frick, he’s passed out again. Can someone help me move him?

Please join us again soon (whenever Rob has recovered from his Thanksgiving hangover) for more Yoga with Rob!

November 27, 2009 | Categories: Robert Pattinson | Tags: , | Leave A Comment »

RobNip™ 4.4 – Yoga with Rob

Everyone has been hit hard by the economy. We all seem to need a little extra money nowadays. And that includes Rob. Accordingly, Rob has decided to take a second job to earn his Heineken and Hot Pocket money. Unfortunately, his drinking habits are leading to a few minor issues in his side career…

Please join us as we present, Yoga with Rob.

First off, everyone breathe deeply. In and out. Arms up in a Sun Salutation pose. And bring them back down.

Please get on your hands and knees. Rob will be starting with the Cat Cow pose.

Rob hasn’t been practicing yoga very long, but we feel he shows excellent promise. He just needs to lay off the drinking to fully come into his own….

Remember to focus on your breathing. Now Rob will move into the bridge pose.

Rob could use a little work on his form, yes? Perhaps someone wouldn’t mind removing the Heineken from his right hand? I think that’s getting in his way.

Since Rob seems to be a little, erm, under the weather today, lets finish up with the corpse pose. Oh look! Rob has that down exactly! Great job, Rob! Rob? Honey? Frick, I think we’re gonna need some help to get him back to bed…

Please join us next week, for more Yoga with Rob!

October 23, 2009 | Categories: Robert Pattinson | Tags: , , | Leave A Comment »

Cap’n 6-Pack’s Adventures: Beer Pong

It’s ROMICS STRIP Wednesday!

October 7, 2009 | Categories: Robert Pattinson | Tags: , , | Leave A Comment »

RobNip™ 1.2 – Drunk Rob for Prez

Myyyy felloowww Am’ricans,
tooniiight I present yooouuu a fir slook
at my new campaiiign
“Vote for me, Heiney and Robgasms for all”

*This message has been approved by the Rob-Nipulations Drunk Rob Support Group*

The “DrunkRob for Prez” staff includes @buhbeesgirl and @melarimo, as well as your faithful bloggers

But really, if we can’t have Prez Drunk Rob, we’ll settle for RoButler without hesitation!

butlerrob

MMM. He can service us anytime.

We could certainly find a private party where he could serve us *coughMEcough* Or he could star at my sister’s bridal shower… But who am I kidding, we aren’t sharing RoButler with anyone!! (ahem. except for @RobaholicsAnon, who requested him)

October 1, 2009 | Categories: Robert Pattinson | Tags: , , , | 2 Comments »

ROMIC STRIP



*drum rolls*



September 30, 2009 | Categories: Robert Pattinson | Tags: , , , | Leave A Comment »

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